On Moving Across the World (Or How Not Having a Plan Scares the Sh*t Out of Me)

kunanyi by  Nina Hamilton

kunanyi by Nina Hamilton

how do you begin writing a semi-formal announcement about moving across the world because your visa is running out? 

i haven't known how to, and i've been avoiding writing this for that reason (and others, i guess) 

how do you write about how you moved across the world for love that you thought was gonna be a forever kind of love and how that love ended? it's been a really weird thing i haven't been able to properly speak about on the internet for a bunch of reasons, but mainly because of bureaucracy. i am on a visa that is tied to the existence of a love relationship with my now ex partner. in the eyes of the government, our relationship was the only thing worth letting me hang out in australia for. not my contribution economically or to my community. not for making this a home for over 4 years.

(to be clear, i'm so so so aware of my immense privilege to have been able to move here of my own free will to begin with, and that my US citizenship has made my life pretty fkn easy. and even though i'm not as active in making this choice to move back to the US as I'd like to be, I am not fleeing, and I get to return to a place of relative stability and comfort (even though of all the times i could possibly have to move back to the US, the era of the Sentient Cheeto is not what i would have preferred) ) 

ani's blunnies and socks by kunanyi by  Nina Hamilton

ani's blunnies and socks by kunanyi by Nina Hamilton

i guess now what i'm doing is trying to stay present for my last month in Tasmania, accepting that this place has had an enormous impact on me as a person, but that it can be let go of (at least physically). i'm trying to stay grounded in the idea that home is in your body, and i'm trying to remind myself that i did this move before - i moved across the world (i only knew one person), i moved interstate (i didn't know anyone). this time i have family to come home to, and that feels like such a gift. i know i'll be leaving a chosen family in tasmania, but it helps to remember that this little island isn't going anywhere. and i sure as hell will be back. 

now, when i get back to the US, I don't really have a plan or anything in particular lined up. this scares the shit out of me. i am an organised person, and i like having a plan. 

here's what i do know (so we can spend time together in the places we are, and in case you might have any suggestions for what to do/where to live/where to work): 

November (location: Tasmania) 

8th/9th Nov: teaching at Commuknitty - 10am-11am Mathers House. This is a free learn-to-knit skillshare. come on by! 

7th Nov: teaching at Lily and Dot (Hobart) - sold out shawl knitting class

14th Nov-23rd Nov: traveling Tas with my little brother 

If you were hoping for a little private tutelage in knitting, or small group stuff, I'm available, so get in touch

I'll also be selling a few things (my bicycle, some clothes, a DSLR), so if any of that is of interest lemme know. I'll probably end up posting the clothes and yarn on instagram in stories. 

Dec (location ~ Bay Area) 

Landing in the Bay and going from there. I went to Berkeley so I'm fairly comfortable with at least that part of the east bay, but if anyone has any advice on what i should be doing in the bay, places that are good to work for, yarn stores to teach in, pls send me your thoughts.

and if anyone just wants to hang out or go for walks or just hug each other or cry a little bit (or a lot) pls HMU because i'll probably just be doing that for most of the month of December/always

in big, confused, perpetual WIP love,

x ani